Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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p

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Please ignore this statement.

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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A: Do you like it B: No

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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