Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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fish fishy caoimhin

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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