Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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A sober Amy Winehouse

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What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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Dave: Knock, knock Steven: Come in.

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

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All the other dinosaurs were laughing and teasing the tyrannosaurus because of his tiny arms. They left and the T.rex was sobbing uncontrollably next to a giant fern. "What's the matter little fellow?" said Jesus. The crying dinosaur looked down and said "I That's the end of my stupid puppet show, cuz I couldn't think of anything a blubbering dinosaur would say to our Lord and saviour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops