Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

If i knew people where coming i would have trimed my antlers

14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

Did you hear about the guy who lost his arm and leg in a car crash? Well, he just died in hospital. RIP.

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...