Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

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So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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SEX

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Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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What did the snake say to the rat?

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Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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