Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

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Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops