Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

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4 hours later.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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So an irish man walks into a bar, 10 seconds later he is dead. What happened was there was a sharp piece of metal on the bar so is cut his throat and he bleed to death.

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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fridge

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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