What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

What did the retard say to the other retard.. hey timmy how was work?

TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

How do you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? You find someone you trust and say "an elephant has been in my refrigerator".

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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