What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

What's white, warm, and dangerous? Cum.

Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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