What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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25

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Susie fell of a swing and died Knock Knock Who's there Susie

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

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Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

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where did juan go after getting hit by a bus? the ground

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women's rights, lol

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? the pigment in their skin.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

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whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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