PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the cop say to the man arrested for speeding? You were going over the speed limit sir, I'm going to have to give you a ticket for that.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock. Who's there? .

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What has a mouth but cant talk Helen keller What has eyes but cant see Helen keller What has ears but cant hear You guessed it an ear of corn

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn What starts with B and ends with ITCH? Bewitch

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops