A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had Gonorrhea.

What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

vaginas are pretty!!!!

What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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