Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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A black guy walks up to the cash register at a gas station with his hands in his pockets... He pulls out a 5 dollar bill and buys a pack of gum.

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Peter

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Q:Why didn't Mr. Fuzzy have to cut his hair anymore? A: Because he was diagnosed with cancer

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

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A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops