Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

why couldnt jimmys feet touch the ground? he was hanging.

what do you call a baby rapest jordan gregg

Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

Refrigerator

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

why did reed eat a fish? He had cancer of the testicles

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

stuarts mum

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

Q. If you have 4 pencils and I have 7 apples, how many pancakes can we fit on the roof? A. Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

You have friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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