dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Ron Paul for President!

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my mind's eye?

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Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

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Yo momma's so fat she ate Sally's arms. Knock Knock Who's There. The police we have a warrant for your mothers arrest on charges of cannibalism and kidnapping.

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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8=> >->-o

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Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

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What is a black man's favorite fast food restauraunt? Varies.

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Do you know what's funny? 9/11

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops