a korean man with no legs sits on a porch. He has no legs so it's considered standing

How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

Your mom is so fat she's overweight

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

What's the difference between an X-box and Michael Jackson? One is an inanimate object and the other is a human being.

Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

How do asians chop their food? CHOPSTICKS! Moral: Yeah that one sucked... ON PURPOSE! Now you dont have to feel inferior ALL the time, you feel equal even though you arent! Ill allow you :D

Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

why was the boy sad? because.

John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

anti-joke.com

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

What hurts more than a bullet? A bullet penetrating your skin, muscle and embedding itself in your body

I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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