Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road. Because it was hit by a truck.

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

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What's the difference between? Your mom.

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

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Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What did the man and woman do in bed together? Sleep.

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Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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What happened as a result of the bitter terrorist attack? The president began to devise a plan to help the abused child

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What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Autism speaks but not really

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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