How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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I'm a champion. I do what I want.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

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world peace

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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I have aids

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Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

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Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

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A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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