What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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I would rape her

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

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Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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Yo mama is so fat, she eats three times the normal amount of calories one should eat in a single day. This resulted in her early demise, to which you mourned for numerous months before accepting the fact that she was gone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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