-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

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A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

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Why did the Korean shoot the dog? Unfortunately, the dog was suffering from a severe mental trauma it had sustained when it by got hit by a car. This caused the dog to be extremely aggressive and it ruthlessly attacked a 5-year old girl playing in the street. The Korean who was coming home from a day out hunting in the woods saw the girl and shot the dog from long range to save the girl's life. The man was later thanked by the girl's family.

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What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

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A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

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no

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

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How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

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What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

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"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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The Female Orgasm

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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