A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Q: Why does an elephant have flat feet? A: From jumping out of trees

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Tunechi

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knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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my mom died because she was morbidly obese

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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