What did the kid say to the ginger? You're gay.

Jimmy wet his pants in class during geography class. The teacher asked: "Oh Jimmy, why did you do that?" Jimmy answered: "I don't know" Everyone laughed at him and Jimmy went home very sad. And with wet pants.

How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

Like why period? Why can't mother nature just call and be like ''Wassup girl? You're not pregnant, I'll talk to you next month.''

What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

women's rights

What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...