What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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Sophie Cameron is Gay

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

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How are a cow and a wall the same? They both go "moo". Except for the wall.

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what is worse then finding a worm in your apple find a worm in your ass

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

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Do you like apples? Yes

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What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

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hey justin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops