Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

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Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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Answer The Following!! Q: How Do You Kill Bee?? Q: What Do You Call A Bee Who Live In America?? Q: Why Don't You Give Elsa A Balloon??

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind.

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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balls

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What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops