When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

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My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

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How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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What is White over Black? Society.

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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trumpy trumpy trump

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wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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1. In 2010, 8.8 million people fell ill with Tuberculosis. 2. Up to 70,000 children died in 2010 due to Tuberculosis. 3. Tuberculosis is the leading killer of people living with HIV with 1.4 million deaths. 4. Death from Tuberculosis has dropped 40% since 1990. 5. No country has ever eliminated Tuberculosis entirely. 6. About 46 million Tuberculosis patients have been successfully treated since 1995. 7. Children under 5 years old rarely get the disease. 8. Edgar Allen Poe’s mother, foster mother, and wife all died of Tuberculosis. 9. It can take up to 12 months to recover from Tuberculosis. 10. People with tuberculosis have symptoms such as cough that “won’t go away”, a cough that brings up blood, a fever lasting longer than 2 weeks, night sweats, fatigue, or noticeable amounts of acute weight loss. 11. Nearly 2 million people die from tuberculosis yearly. 12. Tuberculosis kills 5,000 people daily.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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This sentence is false.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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