How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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