why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

jews

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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