What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

Do you play piano? No

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

What's white and horny? A unicorn

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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