Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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