Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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i hate non minorities!

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops