Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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