What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

8================D-------- (.Y.)

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

America needs to burn Less fossil fuels to save the environment

You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

Roses are red Violets are blue classic

You were born.

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

Whats brown a sticky, shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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