What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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your no better than a cockroach

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops