What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Women's rights.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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