copy me and i will kill you

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...