What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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Democracy.

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops