Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Penis

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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If youre African, why are you white?

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops