How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why was the old man on the ground he fell

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where's the soap?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops