Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

What is a Zebra? Zebras (/?z?br?/ zeb-r? or /?zi?br?/ zee-br?)[1] are several species of African equids (horse family) united by their distinctive black and white stripes. Their stripes come in different patterns, unique to each individual. They are generally social animals that live in small harems to large herds. Unlike their closest relatives, horses and donkeys, zebras have never been truly domesticated.

the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

So, a screw driver walks into a bar, and the bar tender sais "Hey Screw Driver" we have a drink named after you" the screw driver goes, "Really? You have a drink named Bob"

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

Who invented apple? God

6

why did the zebra cross the road?

A black guy, a white guy, and an Asian guy walk into a library. They were getting help from the Asian guy on their math homework.

What hurts more than a bullet? A bullet penetrating your skin, muscle and embedding itself in your body

Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...