Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

The morning of her 16th birthday, April's parents presented her with a young racehorse named Bolt. Bolt was energetic and strong the first two days, easily trotting around their 4 acre estate, but the following morning, when April went out to bring Bolt his breakfast, she found him leaning on his stable, head down, slowly rolling side to side. Upon seeing her newfound friend in distress, she promptly asked, "Are you okay Bolt? Why the long face?" Soon after, April realized that she had made a clever pun and grinned childishly. April's glory was short lived however, when Bolt suddenly collapsed due to an aortic aneurysm. Having spent most of their retirement on this racehorse, April's parents sold the ranch and moved into a retirement home, disgracing their daughter for not taking care of their steed. April, believing herself to be the culprit for Bolt's death, later committed suicide.

What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

A seal walks into a club.

the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

why did the deer jump, because there was something in it's way

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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