How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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A man's car broke down on a lonely country road in the middle of a stormy night. Spotting a light in a farmhouse nearby, he made his way there through the mud and driving rain, and knocked on the door. The farmer who lived there answered, and said what while he didn't have any room in the house, the barn would provide shelter and warmth until morning. Thankful for the hospitality, the stranded man made his way to the barn and made a place to sleep in the hay. As the lightning flickered outside, briefly illuminating the barn's interior, he noticed knot-holes in the wood of the stall walls, and the hoses of a milking machine laying nearby. He then fell fast asleep. The farmer woke him up in the morning, and together they rode on a tractor to the road to make the necessary repairs to the man's automobile, but only after enjoying a country breakfast prepared by the farmer's wife and lovely eighteen year old daughter.

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knock knock who's there me me who? me me me me who? me me me me me me who? and the more the joke continues the less funny and more annoying it gets

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okay so this guy walks into the bar and says DON BE STUPE SHE SPIT GOOD AND EVERYTHIN. why did he say that. BECAUSE EVERYBODY HATES HIS SPIT

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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What did Coke say to Pepsi? "Hello."

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Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

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Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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Q:what word starts with "p" and ends with "orn"? A: popcorn

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What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

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Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

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Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

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Why did the bud driver drop his ice cream? Because he hit a boy.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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