What did the cow say right before he was slaughtered and later to be sold? Nothing cows dont talk they can create a sound that most people describe as MOO though.

I wonder if barrack Obama will rename the whitehouse...to the blue house because it is his favorite color

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

what do you call a black man on a bike? a black man on a bike.

How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

You're*

What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

Have you ever listened to the smell of the color 9? It tastes like freedom!

my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

Wanna hear a joke? Yes Then go on the internet and find some jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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