*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

One watermelon said the the other watermelon, "you are looking mighty plump today", the other watermelon didn't say anything because watermelons cant talk

What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

Penisland

What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

No.

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What'sucks and white Jackson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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