Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

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Your existance.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

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What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

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Pinus Testicles

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

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There's a car about to hit me.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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