Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

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What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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Call of Duty is Awesome So is fingering a dead lion with an iron dildo

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You have cancer

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Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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