Robin, get in the batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Having legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, violets are blue, I told you she was my Mom, but that didn't stop you!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A little boy ran to the pool to see how long he could hold his breath. He slipped and fractured his skull.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops