roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

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What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

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What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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poop

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Zach Barlow

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

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Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

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rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

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What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

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lybia

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A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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