Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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Knock Knock Who's There?? Its the police your family have died in a tragic road accident

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman crashed onto a desert island... The Englishman swiftly used his satellite phone to broadcast their location and they were taken home to their worried families.

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

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ORGANISM. Yeah, I thought it said "orgasm" too.

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

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Why was the man crying? Because he was punched in the stomach.

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Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

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Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

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How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

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kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

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why were Tamika and Tyron afraid to get into the water? They weren't

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

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How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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Why did the black man cross the road? He had a job interview precisely 10 minutes after this event occurred.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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