KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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why is john so fat years of over eating

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Why did the old man fall off a bicycle? He had a fridge thrown at him.

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Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

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Wade's the father

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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all these jokes suck ass

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why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

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Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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Cancer.

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How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

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Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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