A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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Your mamas so fat. She fat.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.3

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Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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Heartlight

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What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One of them I like to eat, and the other one is a watermelon.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

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Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he saw a naked child alone in an alleyway? It is unknown, as he cannot be asked about this hypothetical scenario due to his passing in 2009.

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How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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