Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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You're mother is so fat the doctors say she has a serious obesity problem and will most likely have to go on cholesterol pills and begin regulating her diet properly.

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what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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What looks like half an apple? The other half.

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What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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what's brown and sticky? a turd.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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whats long and hard on a black man? his femur.

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Sorry boss

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What's a black person's favorite thing to eat? Food.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Why can't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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